Today a lifelong dream was realized: I find myself in Bowling Green, KY, one of the few cities in the world in which one can arrange a WHITE CASTLE VS. KRYSTAL TASTE TEST! Both serve onion-riddled sliders, and though normally they are parted like brothers fighting for opposite sides in the Civil War, in Bowling Green they are but two blocks away from each other! Notes follow. Image: White Castle buildings look like a putt-putt version of a castle, which gives them a leg up; Krystal buildings look like a 50s chrome diner crossed with a greenhouse. WC’s slider box is lame—it should look more castley, with more fringe at the top. Price: WC’s cheese slider is 85 cents, K’s is 93. These prices are high when you consider that McDonald’s double cheeseburger is about $1. White Castle cheeseburger: The bun was mushy and slimy inside. The top was crunchy, so maybe it was stale. Biting into it, all I could taste were the onions—which seemed to be diced onions mixed with some weird onion puree. I could barely tell the meat was there. Pictured: Krystal on left, White Castle on right Cheese Krystal: You can see how fluffy the steamed bun is; it’s soft and tasty, not mushy. There was a lot of mustard on the Krystal, which gave it a strong tartness. The burger tasted like real meat, making it more than a mere onion-holder. There are a lot of onions here, too, but none of the nasty onion puree. A bite of the Krystal was a bit saltier. THE WINNER??!?!? Krystal, by far. The White Castle burger looked and tasted like a shit smear. The Cheese Krystal had too much mustard on it, but that’s my only complaint. Mark it down—another gross thing the South does better.

Today a lifelong dream was realized: I find myself in Bowling Green, KY, one of the few cities in the world in which one can arrange a WHITE CASTLE VS. KRYSTAL TASTE TEST! Both serve onion-riddled sliders, and though normally they are parted like brothers fighting for opposite sides in the Civil War, in Bowling Green they are but two blocks away from each other! Notes follow.

Image: White Castle buildings look like a putt-putt version of a castle, which gives them a leg up; Krystal buildings look like a 50s chrome diner crossed with a greenhouse. WC’s slider box is lame—it should look more castley, with more fringe at the top.

Price: WC’s cheese slider is 85 cents, K’s is 93. These prices are high when you consider that McDonald’s double cheeseburger is about $1.

White Castle cheeseburger: The bun was mushy and slimy inside. The top was crunchy, so maybe it was stale. Biting into it, all I could taste were the onions—which seemed to be diced onions mixed with some weird onion puree. I could barely tell the meat was there.


White Castle vs. Krystal
Pictured: Krystal on left, White Castle on right

Cheese Krystal: You can see how fluffy the steamed bun is; it’s soft and tasty, not mushy. There was a lot of mustard on the Krystal, which gave it a strong tartness. The burger tasted like real meat, making it more than a mere onion-holder. There are a lot of onions here, too, but none of the nasty onion puree. A bite of the Krystal was a bit saltier.

THE WINNER??!?!? Krystal, by far. The White Castle burger looked and tasted like a shit smear. The Cheese Krystal had too much mustard on it, but that’s my only complaint. Mark it down—another gross thing the South does better.